Taking One for the Team

This year, I signed up to do Corporate Challenge. For those of you who don't know what this is, it is a two month event where companies compete in various events for points. I think the winner gets bragging rights, but who really gives a shit when you're standing around the water cooler with the guy who won the ping pong event?

Anyway, I signed up to do shot put. It was a new event, added this year. I used to do shot in high school. I used to be good at it. Besides, how many women would want to do this?

Hah! Only about every other employed person with a vagina who works in Kansas City, that's who!

Funny enough, my mom's company volunteered her to do shot put for her company. She, having never thrown one in her life, would be participating.

The day of the event, we drive to BFE Johnson County, where it seems like there is a hundred women who are going to do the same event. Just from overhearing conversations, I was able to surmise that most of these women threw in high school as well.

Ahhh, a chance to relive our glory days!!

They provided shot puts for us to use, but one woman brought her own. It left me to wonder, who the hell owns their own shot put????

Before I throw, the guy with the clipboard asks me what company I work for. I'm speechless for a moment because my company has decided the use the largest emblem possible on the front of my t-shirt, as showcased by my generous mammary endowment.

My knee was killing me, so I threw like shit, not able to do a proper approach. It didn't matter, because this Amazon woman shows up and lobs the damn thing halfway across the field.

Game over.

I overheard her tell someone that she was 35, and had been throwing since she was 9. Some girls play with dolls, others play with 8.5lb balls. Seriously. Maybe she should have been the one to show up with her own shot put.

Next year, I'm not going to throw. I've decided to try pool. Mom's got a pool table, and I have all year to hone in my skillz. Maybe by then, corporate challenge with add a crochet event. I'd totally clean house with that.