Monday, May 30, 2011

When Things Fall Apart for Other People

Brother and Co whittled down their numbers earlier this year by the breaking of the relationship with the other half. She played a gambit, and lost. The thing is with men, when they are ready to get married...they will do it. Ultimatums for marriage from a guy who has already bought a nice house, converted his basement for your home salon, made your car payments, and created a stable home life for you and your children is generally not a good idea. My brother had already changed much of himself for her, and yet it wasn't nearly enough.

Brother isn't too horribly upset about it. He's got his little princess, and really has no burning desire to strap on the old ball and chain. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. His ambivalence towards Baby Mama infuriates her, now she's got her current boyfriend sending brothers emails on how to raise his own daughter. Baby Mama proofreads the emails before they are sent. How did we not pick up on The Crazy before?

Meanwhile, paradise for Redneck Brother has descended into hell as his wife has also become afflicted with The Crazy. She quit her job because she decided she didn't want to have one anymore. You'd think that without a job, she would tend to the home fires, but no. She doesn't cook, she doesn't clean. She barely cares for her two children. Instead, she spends all her time on the computer. Redneck Brother discovered a webcam and lingerie that she doesn't wear for him. She wants to go back to the days where she could go out and party and sleep with random men as long as they pay for her beer tab...which is pathetic when you are a haggard-looking 34 year old mother of two. Meanwhile, the two kids are bordering on beyond control because Crazy-Lazy Mom has already gone to work turning them against their father. So, with only one income, Redneck Brother is behind on all his bills, and is teetering on foreclosure, with a family that hates him.

Mother and I have decided that if the boys ever do decide to want to get into serious relationships down the road, we will have to personally interview them. I am currently designing a psychological test. Mother is formulating the application...complete with references: job, past boyfriends, and a full-scale workup for STDs.

I know my brothers will come out of these trials fine. We're a resilient, resourceful bunch. But still, I hate that they have gone through this. What's a big sister to do?


Bill the Painter said...

Yep, I've dated and was even engaged to "the crazy" before. You put a bunch of effort into it and it's never enough. You get blamed for everything, constantly ragged on, told how successful her friend's husbands are (because they have flatscreens above every fireplace), etc. It surprised the hell out of her when she threatened to leave...and I encouraged it! Buh-bye!

My brother (almost) got saddled with a lazy welfare-collecting lowlife who wanted to be a housewife...not not really do the work involved, but have her friends over all day, etc. Happy day when her ass was booted out...

We've all been there and bounced (mostly) back. Your brothers will do fine.

Nuke said...

I guess I am lucky. My little bro married a sweetheart. I guess that means that I am tho on who attracts the crazy.

Mostly kidding.

Back to YOUR brothers. If they are as tough and well adjusted as you, they'll be fine.