It's a Small Gym After All

Mom recently got a membership to the gym I work out at. Now, we work out together. It's good because I am more inclined to go when I have a workout buddy.

My usual workout is 30-50 minutes on the elliptical machine and then some weight training. Usually my arms and back. We're starting to see some big 'uns at work, and I need to be stronger so I can move them without hurting myself. Let me tell you, moving a 500+ pound patient from one side of the bed to the other is not for the faint of heart.

Anyway, I tried something different just to gauge how my knee would react, and I hopped on a regular treadmill, and cranked it up pretty high, running at a fairly good clip. I was pleased immensely to find that my knee wasn't even bothered. However, I do need to look at getting a better sports bra before I do anymore of this running stuff. It's hard to focus on running when you are constantly worried about giving yourself a concussion with your ginormous sweater kittens.

However, it gives me hope when I think that I can resume running. I used to run in my younger years. I used to be good at it. It's another option to do during the day when I have nothing better to do.

On my periphery, I noticed some guy hopped on the treadmill next to me. Unfortunately, that one was broken, so he moved a couple ones down. After I stopped running, I glanced over at the guy and realized that I knew him. Back from my church days in the singles congregation. I yelled his name and he looked at me, and stumbled. Oops.

I wandered over and started gabbing. It's been years since I've talked to him. Gosh, something to the tune of five years or more. While we were talking, he cranked his treadmill up at a full sprint. And he maintained his normal conversation with me while he was doing it. Ass. Had I been charging that fast on a treadmill, the only words I would be able to muster is "Call 911!"

At any rate, he was always nice when we went to church together. I remember once when I was a CPR instructor, I had a class for the singles group. I was demonstrating the Heimlich, and he was my volunteer. Before we began, I told him not to do the abdominal thrusts because a) I wasn't choking and b) because it wouldn't feel nice to a person who wasn't choking. He did it anyway, lifting me a foot off the ground as he did so, almost making dinner from earlier make a second appearance.

Mom told me I should have given him my phone number. I just shrugged. He's still big into church. Me, not so much. What would I say? "I don't attend church AND I sell sex toys. Want to hang out???"

The missionaries would probably be on my doorstep the following day.

Prepare for the Invasion!!

This weekend was the General Conference for the LDS church. In keeping with tradition, I didn't go. I worked. It's what I do. I work weekends. Anyway, I heard the news that the church plans on building a temple in the "greater Kansas City area". No word on the specifics, but loads of speculation because this is an INCREDIBLY HUGE DEAL to the church and it's flock. Even I, the wayward member, damn near fell out of my chair when I heard about it. Actually, my reaction was more along the lines of, "Holy shit!"

It's unlikely they will put it in Independence, but you never know. If they announce anywhere in Jackson county, the entire state of Utah is going to completely lose their minds. And maybe some of Idaho. And California. And Arizona. On an upside, you will be able to sell your house for a lot more, housing slump or not. I've seen what houses go for in Utah. They will gladly pay extra to live in the land of Zion. That's a hell of a feature. Plus, it also helps if you have more than one bathroom.

I hope it's not in JoCo because I still have a sour taste in my mouth from dealing with the singles group there from my own days of being a social coordinator. Those asshats are smug enough as it is without making it worse.

Anywhere north of the river would be okay. Wyandotte would even be acceptable. Bonus points if they park it near the racetrack. Would they close the temple on race days? It's kind of hard to keep that warm, fuzzy, reverent feeling with the sound of NASCAR blaring from next door.

Whatever the case, look for an influx of Utah Mormons to descend upon us, jello molds and all.

God help us.

And Now For Some Irony

Someone I know just had their first sexual experience. They were raised a Mormon, but are what we know as "inactive". For whatever reasons, they don't go to church, and don't live the church life.

The ironic part? His first sexual experience came from a girl he met on a Mormon dating website.

I can't think of anything to say with that...

I'm Not a Failure

My far away friend, Rachel, posted this awesome post the other day about church, marriage, and all the things that are tied with it. Initially, it pissed me off (as it did Rachel), and then I experienced some feelings of hurt. I can't really add a whole lot to what she said because she said it perfectly, but instead I can only reflect on my own personal feelings in the matter of the Mormon Church, marriage, and me.

Even though I haven't been going to church, I don't hate it. Being a Mormon is still part of my identity, but it is not the primary thing that identifies me. Much like being a nurse. I still admire the way the church values family. Their charitable nature. I can listen to a General Authority speak and know he's just not paying me lip service in exchange for a monetary contribution.

I work weekends, so going to church really isn't an option because it's too hard to stay awake to attend, but maybe I use that as an excuse not to go. I'm too old to attend singles branch (congregation consisting only of singles under 30), and when I've tried to attend the family wards, I'm sort of an island. Sitting by myself. Curious looks in my direction and my wrinkled scrubs. From their looks, I can tell they are wondering why I am alone. It's that look that all older singles get because if you are single and over 30, then there is something wrong with you. Whether it be you are ugly, or mentally unbalanced, or you are divorced (which is just as bad).

I'm not single because no one will have me. I'm single because I choose to be. A lot of those older women in the church don't understand that. They don't understand how someone could willingly chose to be single...and be HAPPY about it. They don't think that a single person could possibly have something valuable to contribute other than babysitting in the church nursery while the marrieds can go to Sacrament.

(I must point out that it's the members (not all, but a certain few) that engage in this mindset. The higher-ups in the church have admonished members for bring retarded in this manner...but to no success.)

I don't think of myself as a failure for not being married. I still think that I can be a valuable member of society while still carrying my father's name. I believe there is more to me than my child-bearing capabilities. I have a degree, a career, a home, friends. Why, then, do some people look at me as being less than a person because I never knelt at the altar? When I am around members my age who have families, they talk about their husbands and children, and when I speak about things that are going on in the world, I am met with blank stares.

I've known girls who have literally sat and waited for their "eternal companion" to come along. Why get a college degree when you are just going to be a stay-at-home Mom? Why buy a house when your husband is just going to buy one when you get married? Why go see places when that is something you are going to do with your husband? I remember sitting in my Bishop's office with a couple other girls discussing the fact that one of the high counselors in the women's group was single, and one girl loudly announced, "I'd rather be dead than 40 and no married!" She was only 22.

At any rate, most girls I know that married really young are either divorced, or are in crappy marriages and won't get out of them because they don't want the gossiping old bats in church to think of them as failures. The ones who waited to get married, who wanted to experience life before they took the vows...they have the most solid marriages I know of. They are equal partners, and they can talk to you about more than what can be done with a can of cream of mushroom soup. I would also like to point out that these girls were raised in families that encouraged personal growth and independence.

I'm not ruling out the possibility of ever taking the plunge, but I want it to be on my terms. Not because it was expected of me. Maybe someday I will (in the event a certain Catholic pulls his head out of his ass...). Until that time happens, I will just go on living my life, doing the things that bring me joy, and not being a failure.

Dear Lord

I usually have words for just about anything that I come across.

This would not be one of those things. I don't know whether I should be shocked...or if I should buy a bunch and give them out as Christmas presents.

All I know is, the return missionaries I usually encounter look nothing, NOTHING like these guys.

If they did, I would have to rethink my self-imposed ban on dating one.

Al Sharpton is an Asshole and Other Revelations

Mitt Romney is being far too nice. A lot more than I would be.

I'm not a huge fan of Romney, even though we both happen to be members of the same church. Just because we are both Mormon, doesn't mean he's going to automatically get my vote...which is one of the great things about the Church. It doesn't exercise influence in how I vote. In fact, I distinctly remember the bishop reading a statement from the church leaders before every major election that emphasized that the church was not endorsing any one candidate or another, and every member should exercise their own free agency and vote according to what they felt.

But I'm not here to discuss the Church and it's role in politics. I'm not even here to discuss Romney's candidacy.

"As for the one Mormon running for office, those who really believe in God will defeat him anyways, so don't worry about that; that's a temporary situation," Sharpton said during a debate with Hitchens at the New York Public Library.

Then, Mitt had to go and take the high road in reply:

"I don't know Reverend Sharpton," he (Romney) said. "I doubt he is personally such a thing, but the comment was a comment which could be described as a bigoted comment."

After being called to the mat in a very passive-aggressive sort of way by Romney, Big Al is engaging in the most pathetic attempts of CYA (Cover Your Ass) that I have been witness to since John Kerry inserted foot to mouth with his Stupid Goes to Iraq comment:

"In no way did I attack Mormons or the Mormon Church when I responded that other believers, not atheists, would vote against Mr. Romney for purely political reasons," Sharpton said.

That's funny...it sure sounded like a slam to Mormons to just about anyone who heard it.

If you believe that Big Al is not a bigot, then I bet you also believe that Paris Hilton really had no clue she wasn't supposed to drive on a suspended license. However, I'm willing to give Mitt some credit. After all, you have to be living under a rock if you think that Al Sharpton isn't a racist, bigoted douchebag, right? No, I'm willing to believe that Mitt knows what Big Al truly is (a big turd aside), but is refraining from getting into the mudslinging that so many politicians have been getting into as of late.

I, however, am not above such mudslinging. The meek members turn the other cheek (as they should). Members like me, give the finger.

Al Sharpton, you are an asshole, and an ignorant one at that. You should go hang out with Ol Fred's gang. Something tells me that you guys would have lots in common, like your penchant for hate, contention, and fear mongering. Not to mention the fact that you are all famewhores.

I'm not the most devout member of the Mormon church, but I am still a Mormon and could never be anything but a Mormon. It pisses me off when I hear stuff like this. Yeah, you could send someone to talk to Big Al to explain what the church is and what it believes in, but it would fall in deaf ears. You can't educate someone with the IQ of a grapefruit.

I think Big Al may have bitten off more than he can chew this time. There's no one he can rally or get fired, and he can't tie this to race. No, he's attacked one of the very principles this country was founded on: freedom of religion without persecution.

Now, we have people from all different religions jumping to the defense of Romney and the Church. So, Big Al may have done Romney a big favor...I don't know.

Al Sharpton is still an asshole. While he might be deserving of the Ray Nagin Dumbass Award, I don't feel like giving him anything but my foot up his ass.