Monday, January 11, 2010

Nurse Follies: Back at My OTHER Job...

Dear Experienced Nurse New-Hire,

For veteran nurses, it is understood that you have work experience. Otherwise, the term "veteran nurses" wouldn't exist. You go to work at a new facility as a veteran nurse, it is assumed that you already know fundamental nursing things. Dependent on your previous work history, there may be some degree of expectation that you have a working knowledge of a nursing specialty: ER, ICU, Cardiac, etc.

Your new coworkers may ask you upon the first time of meeting you where you worked before, they are just curious, or making idle conversation during down time or lunch break. Then, it is appropriate to expound on your resume. You can wow us with your experiences, about the time you saved a patient from the brink of death with your ingenuity, a Styrofoam cup, and some duct tape.

However, a little humility goes a long way.

Constantly telling us about your other job wears thin. Especially when you are using it as a comparison to show us that we are doing it all wrong. We don't care. If we did care, we'd work for the crap hole you just came from. And if the other place was so damn perfect, why did you leave them to come work for us in the first place? Oh right, you're other employer is hemorrhaging money and is this close to closing.

At the beginning of the shift, I was gracious. And patient. And fun. I didn't lecture you on nursing, because you've been a nurse longer than I have. I wasn't there to teach you nursing. I was there to teach you ACME Hospital's way of doing things, which apparently is different than the way they do it at Bob's Community Hospital because you were mentioning it every ten minutes. I let it slide because I thought you were nervous. However, when you decided to pick away at how I do things, how I governed the floor when I was in charge because it's not how you do it when you get to be charge nurse, I decided I didn't like you.

So, do not act surprised when you come to me to point out another thing we are doing wrong and openly stating that it's a horrible policy/practice, and I wryly reply, "Oh, that's just because we suck around here."

Twelve hours of this, you got lucky...I only snapped at you once. What you didn't see were my coworkers keeping sharp objects out of my reach.

To orient a new hire, we get paid $2 more an hour. That's $24 extra for one shift, but after taxes is probably closer to $20. So, for twelve hours, I had to listen to, "At my other job..." and was compensated with $20 and high blood pressure.

NOT worth it.

So, thank you, for reminding me why I don't like training new hires. Have fun with the rest of your employment at ACME Hospital, Vortex of Suck (according to you).

Your Preceptor/Charge Nurse.


me said...

Thus explaining the rarely heard of phenom of "Nursing Eating It's Veterans"...

There MUST be a special place in hell for these people!

littlepretendnurse said...

Love it. I have heard that other job routine as well. Couldn't roll my eyes back in my head far enough after awhile! lol

Donna said...

You could make money doing this. Anytime I see that you have a new post, I can't get here fast enough.