Wednesday, December 02, 2009

Shocking News is Shocking

Everyone is all agog at the Tiger Woods and the steaming pile of crap he has found himself in. And all he did was crash into a little fire hydrant.

But in crashing into the defenseless fire hydrant, it opens a pandora's box of secrets into his alternative life. Tiger Woods a serial cheater? No, say it isn't so!! Who ever heard of a multi-million dollar athlete married with multiple girlfriends?? Inconceivable!!

I'm going to guess that the imprint of the nine iron on the side of his head tells us that he didn't have an "agreement" with his wife.

Is this really news? Is this really worth obsessing over??

Tiger, perhaps you should google Steve McNair, mm'kay? Dumbass.

And golf still isn't a sport.

3 comments:

Rachel said...

OMG! Too funny! It is NOT news, and it is NOT a sport. Let the TMZ guys report it and leave it off the "news."

kate sweeten said...

Agreed! If I get on CNN.com one more time and find "Tiger Woods is Still a Douscebag!" as the headline one more time, I'm hucking my computer out the window.

Nora said...

George Carlin said it best. "Watching golf is as exciting as watching flies fuck."

Just saying...