Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Born That Way vs. Free Agency

My cousin has decided that she is no longer a lesbian.

My cousin, who a year or so ago, said she didn't agree with the church and it's teachings, is now talking with her local bishop about coming back into the fold.

My cousin, who once argued that she could not possibly force herself to live a lie as a heterosexual, but rather be happy with another woman and face all the adversities it entailed...is now making plans to marry another man...in the temple...with all the trimmings.

To say I am confused, would be an understatement.

I love my cousin dearly, we grew up almost as sisters. While I don't generally agree with the homosexual philosophy of being "born that way", I've also held to the belief that what people do behind closed doors is their own business. It is only when you try to drag it into my house and force it down my throat, that I take issue.

Do I think gays should be allowed to marry? Nope. But on the same token, heterosexuals are not doing the institute of marriage any justice either.

But I'm not here today to expound on morality, or genetic predisposition toward the lifestyle, or whatever arguement either side of the issue will use to prove their case. I'm just here to try to understand just what my cousin is doing.

So, she met this guy...online...in an LDS chat room. They began talking in March. He came out to see her last week and they met face to face for the first time. He popped the big question. They are in love. She is going to out east to see him this fall. They are going to get married in the temple and blathercakes ad nauseum.

Did I mention that she is still living with her girlfriend?

Granted, she says they have not had "relations" in over 5 months (too much info, I know), and that she doesn't consider her a girlfriend anymore, the fact that you are living under the pretense of being "together" is disturbing when you consider that she is making plans to legally marry someone else. Her girlfriend has no clue that any of this is going on.

And how does one go from being a lesbian, to being an upright member of the Mormon church? I've not met this guy, but he sounds pretty hardcore...almost bordering on Fundamentalist sans the pleural wives. He's supposed to be insanely smart, funny, blah, blah, blah. However, I also am under the firm belief that you can be anything you want to be online. So, I shall remain skeptical.

That's me...the family skeptic.

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