Saturday, November 26, 2005

The Best First Date Ever

Okay, so I am on a blogging roll. I sometimes get into these moods where I just have to write.

I was thinking about stuff as I was driving home from the cabin. I think a lot when I drive. I think about a lot of things. As I passed by a certain county justice center, I couldn't help but think of one of the prosecuting attorneys that works there. When I think about Michael (the lawyer, not my brother), my mind always wonders back to our first date...and I can't help but smile.

We had discussed going out for a while, and finally got around to it. We made a plan to go out on a Monday evening. He mentioned that he had a court-thing that night, but it was a small thing, and would only take about 15 minutes. Would I mind just coming along with him to court?? Then we could go directly to the restaurant immediately after.

Sure...why not?

So, Michael shows up at the apartment in what he called his "lawyer costume". Costume or no, he looked pretty damn good. Anyway, he drove us in his Jeep...with very, very bad brakes. They would grind and squeal every time we approached a stop sign or light. Michael told me he had an appointment at the dealership the very next day to get them fixed.

Mike is driving, and I get to hold the map. Neither of us has been to this courthouse which was in some little suburb in Johnson county. We make it to a very small brick building and go inside. I take a seat in the very small, and not-at-all-court-looking courtroom. A desk at the front with a long table, and a room full of chairs. Mike takes a standing spot at the courtroom. Slowly, the room fills up. The janitor comes in carrying a garbage can and disappears into a back room. The judge comes out of the back room in a robe, then I realize that it's the janitor.

It was explained later that in most courts, the judges see the folks who have lawyers first so the lawyers can do their thing and leave. Not so with this court. The janitor-judge just goes straight down the docket. Mike's client is somewhere further down the list. People come and go...not guilty, no contest, guilty, pay your fine, go away. Mike cringes when a woman who has a stack of violations pleas guilty, her husband, who is sitting behind me, almost starts to weep openly. The judge, apparently seeing her husband turn blue, suggests that the woman think about what she is going to do before she makes a plea. Apparently, she was looking at an obscene amount of fines.

Mike disappears into the back room with his client, along with another lawyer. I watch the court proceedings with some interest. One other time, I did manage to observe court...only because I was there for a traffic violation and managed to show up an hour early. This was in KC...the big place downtown. So many people went up for drug charges, and everyone of them plead "not guilty". It gave me a moment's pause. How can someone who was found with crack, the tools to smoke it with, not to mention itemized receipts showing they had sold some of it, and video footage of them smoking crack still manage to plea not guilty?? Okay, so it wasn't as blatant as that. I am always amazed that people caught red-handed will say not guilty, and I will never understand how that flies. But then again, I'm not a lawyer.

At any rate, I watch people shuffle in and out of the, ahem, courtroom. Some big guy sits next to me, I smell him shortly after. At the time, there must have been some sort of soap shortage because this guy had bad body odor...but was wearing a really, really nice leather you can't tell me that maybe he couldn't afford deodorant.

Soon after that, I much bigger man in a Harley jacket sits in front of me...and has the largest plumber's butt-crack I have EVER SEEN...compounded by the fact that this guy had a hairy ass. I immediately pull out my Palm Pilot and start playing solitaire...anything to keep my mind off the hairy butt-crack in front of me, and the smelly man next to me who is now making my eyes water. Throughout all this, Mike keeps turning around and mouthing, "I'm sorry!!" I merely chuckle because only things like this happen to me.

Two afters after our arrival, Mike finally gets to finish with his client and we get to leave. I could tell he felt bad about how our first date was going, and he apologized profusely. I told him I wasn't mad, and I don't think he believed me. However, if I had simply decided to meet him at a restaurant and wait for him...for two hours...I probably would have been more unhappy. But then again, I wouldn't have waited in a restaurant for two hours...

Mike takes me to the Plaza to a place called Grand Falloon. He tells me it is one of his most favorite places. I've never been there. It's a relaxed atmosphere, and not at all prententious...which is me in a nutshell. We order burgers and talk all night. At the time, he was in private practice, and had such interesting stories. We found common ground: we both hate onions, and he has sued my employer, not to mention the very doctor I loathe and despise.

He also keeps apologizing for the court debacle...not to mention that he takes me to a bar for dinner.

He might have been thinking, "She is never going to speak to me again after tonight."

I was thinking, "I hope there is date number two with no legal involvement."

The night ended on a happy note. As he was kissing me, he asked if I realized that our legs were touching all during dinner. I must say that was the exact moment I was reeled in hook, line and sinker.

Funny how life moves on. He took a job in the public sector, thereby sacrificing any semblance of a social life. I started working a lot. I've seen him since then, but nothing concrete has materialized. I suppose if something monumental is meant to pass, it shall. I still think he is a terrific person, and I still have hope. He told me he wanted me to think of him as exceptional. Well, it is safe to say that he accomplished that.

Why, you might be wondering, would I even think this as a best first date? Well, I know a lot of guys pull out the stops to make a great first impression...but is that who they truly are? When time passes, girls tend to forget the flowers, the fancy dinners, and all that other stuff. After it happens so often, it just blends together until nothing stands out...all the faces become blurred and experiences become "something I went with some guy once". I'm sure there are some girls who would look upon this experience with a very sour outlook. I'm not one of those girls. Experiences rich in laughter far exceeds anything in the monetary sense.

You have to admit...sitting in a courtroom for two hours on a first date is pretty damn funny.

I like to think of this as the best first date because it was something I will remember until the day I die.

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