Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Tales of the Homeowner: The Abandoned Car

Apparently, my next door neighbors are slugs. Not my Mom and Mr. Recommendation. The ones who live on the other side of me.

Early last year, the older guy who lived there, parked his late-model, four-door Ford POS in front of my house. I noted that the same car had been parked in front of their house initially. I don't know why they decided to move the car. I don't even know why they thought I wouldn't mind them parking it in front of my house.

So, this car sat there, front tire sitting on my grass. Eventually, the tire became so flat, the whole thing came off the rim. Tags showed they had expired back in 2004. At first, I gave the neighbors a break and figured they would move the car once the weather became favorable. But after a year of looking at it, and bitching about it to everyone else, I decided to I needed to do something about it.

The good neighbor across the street told me that the Slughorns (my name for them), are lazy homeowners. The type that drive everyone nuts. At one point, their house was such an eyesore, complaints were made to the city, who then forced the Slughorns to have their house painted. They don't mow their grass. They don't rake the leaves. They don't do anything but glare at everyone else. Neighbor lady told me that to get these people to do anything, they have to be threatened by the city.

I was perusing the city web page looking for info on bulk item pickup (for Mom, or rather, her old stove), when I saw the 311 call page for services. Clicking on that, I discovered I could make a request for abandoned car pick-up. I just filled in my address, explained the problem, and hit enter.

It was so easy!

I received an email saying that my request had been received and someone would be contacting me shortly. I figured I wouldn't hear from anyone for a week or more, because that is how city government works.

So imagine my shock when a tow truck appeared thirty minutes ago, along with a police officer driving the Ford Focus patrol car (poor guy), and said abandoned car was towed away. I watched with glee and clapped softly (as Brother is asleep in the next room) as it was loaded onto the back of the flatbed, and danced in my office as the driver pulled away. I literally danced.

Now the car is gone. I can't believe it's all gone. Holy shit! If I had known how easy and quick that was going to be, I would have reported it AGES ago.

And the funny thing...some dude looking like Larry the Cable Guy came to my house this morning and asked if the car was mine. He was apparently in the business of buying junk cars and was interested. Or maybe it was all a ruse to determine the tow driver wouldn't get shot at while collecting the car.

Regardless of whether Spanky was legit, I don't care. The car is gone! The car is gone! The car is gone!

I don't know how the Slughorns feel about this, I think they were home during the blessed event. Maybe they were happy to be rid of the thing. Maybe I did them a favor.

Or maybe they are just really, really pissed and are now plotting their revenge.

I'd better keep an eye on Sam when he's in the backyard.


Chimpo said...

We had a car like that at our old apartment. Unfortunately they, they always kept their tags in date. Out of date tags is the key. You can just call the cops and they will normally tow a car just for that.

Spyder said...

Yea for you!

meesha.v said...

cool, I now drive a police cruiser.

Faith said...

There's an abandoned car down the street from my house right now. It's been there for about a week, parked facing the wrong way so it got a ticket, but I noticed that there aren't any license plates on it.

It's nowhere near my house, so I don't really give a fuck. But I have wondered why the people who live in the house it's parked next to (they're a corner lot) don't call to have it picked up. That shit wouldn't last 3 days in front of or next to my place. Nuh-uh.

I contacted OP once about the house 2 doors down from me last year. I knew it was a forclosure, but didn't know which bank owned it. So I let them know that the lawn was a mess and needed mowing BAD, and that the final straw was when the gutter on the front of the house fell half off, so it was just hanging there. Two DAYS later, everything was cleaned up. It was crazy...but awesome.

RDM said...

I love you for gives me hope that I can call in on my Slughorns too!!!

Midtown Miscreant said...

Im guessing the quick response was along the lines of the city contracts that out to a tow company, who stores the car and charges the owner for tow and storage, the owners have x amount of days to pay up or lose car, car goes to scrapper, tow company rakes in the dough. the only losers are the slughorns of the world, who were apparently losers anyway. good for you.

big russ said...

i've learned that when there are idiots who are my neighbors it is best for me to handle them by myself. sometimes it takes a good lashing out at them to let them know that they are invading your(my) space. just like in the business field its much more effective sometimes to get things done yourself instead of waiting for someone else to do your work for you.

Joe said...

When I lived on Tropic Ct on street parking was at a premium. I had a car towed that was sitting there for a week without tags and not going anywhere. Didn't bother me in the least. Every parking spot was sacred.