I'm tired. Really tired.
A ridiculously hot, verile man ravished my body all day, leaving my muscles achey, pain in the right places, and lips swollen, red, and chapped from all that kissing.
Wouldn't it be great if that actually happened?
Instead, y'all are going to have to settle for the truth. I puttered around the house, went to HyVee and bought a loaf of bread, and came home. My lips are red and chapped from licking my tasty gloss off while I was outside.
The first story was much more interesting to read, I'm sure. I mean, who wants to read about me buying a loaf of bread? And some Listerine. And a couple twice-baked potatoes.
That sound? Oh, that's probably Kant slapping her forehead. I don't know why the things I say still surprise her. She should be used to it by now.
I'm going to bed. Maybe I will have a pleasant dream about the first story, and not one about me at the grocery store.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Done
I just finished churning out the power point.
Please note that the time is now 4:30 AM.
I started at 11 PM last night.
Tomorrow, I shall write the full body of my speech from the outline and power point I have created. So far, I feel okay with it...but that could be sleep deprivation talking.
I'm now going to bed.
Please note that the time is now 4:30 AM.
I started at 11 PM last night.
Tomorrow, I shall write the full body of my speech from the outline and power point I have created. So far, I feel okay with it...but that could be sleep deprivation talking.
I'm now going to bed.
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Today's Goings-On
I stopped by Target because they are having their Global Bazaar. It used to be organized into regions: Asian, Indian, African, etc. Now, it's organized according to color. Want a red room? What about green??
I wasn't too impressed with this year's offerings. The only thing I liked was the oriental gong, which would have worked great in my bedroom (being all Asian and stuff), but then reality set in when I remembered that I really didn't have a good place to put it. What would I do with a gong anyway?? Smack it each time I went to bed alone? I'm sure Brother would eventually hide the gong because he would tire of hearing it so often.
At any rate, I hope Target goes back to the original formula next year.
Because the time has come to start the master bath remodel, I went to Lowes to find a new shower pan. The Lowes by my house didn't have any in stock, so I drove up north to that store, which did have one. I still had a little left on the old gift card, so I ended up only having to pay $40 for a new shower base. From there, I stopped by the store to pick up my prescriptions, pay my storage bill, then go back to my neck of the woods. As an afterthought, I stopped by Home Depot to peruse the tile offerings. I found a beige tile that I think will look good on the floor, smaller tiles for the shower with cool little colored accent tiles. Priced some of that stuff you put under the tile to make it heated and almost soiled myself because it was so expensive. Found some different colors that I could potentially paint the parts that don't get covered with tile. I'm getting pretty excited about the bathroom project. I decided to carry my Asian theme to the bathroom. It's going to be awesome when we are finished. I'll remember to post pictures.
Now, I am home, and time to get down to brass tacks on my presentation. I have mountains of notes, and a pretty good idea of the angle that I'm taking with my presentation. I anticipate being up for the rest of the night, at least until this power point is finished. I have a whole twenty minutes to speak, plus the dreaded five minute Q&A that follows.
However, I'm having an issue of a cramping nature...so I am going to have a pharmaceutical intervention, a hot shower, and then I will be ready to get to work.
I wasn't too impressed with this year's offerings. The only thing I liked was the oriental gong, which would have worked great in my bedroom (being all Asian and stuff), but then reality set in when I remembered that I really didn't have a good place to put it. What would I do with a gong anyway?? Smack it each time I went to bed alone? I'm sure Brother would eventually hide the gong because he would tire of hearing it so often.
At any rate, I hope Target goes back to the original formula next year.
Because the time has come to start the master bath remodel, I went to Lowes to find a new shower pan. The Lowes by my house didn't have any in stock, so I drove up north to that store, which did have one. I still had a little left on the old gift card, so I ended up only having to pay $40 for a new shower base. From there, I stopped by the store to pick up my prescriptions, pay my storage bill, then go back to my neck of the woods. As an afterthought, I stopped by Home Depot to peruse the tile offerings. I found a beige tile that I think will look good on the floor, smaller tiles for the shower with cool little colored accent tiles. Priced some of that stuff you put under the tile to make it heated and almost soiled myself because it was so expensive. Found some different colors that I could potentially paint the parts that don't get covered with tile. I'm getting pretty excited about the bathroom project. I decided to carry my Asian theme to the bathroom. It's going to be awesome when we are finished. I'll remember to post pictures.
Now, I am home, and time to get down to brass tacks on my presentation. I have mountains of notes, and a pretty good idea of the angle that I'm taking with my presentation. I anticipate being up for the rest of the night, at least until this power point is finished. I have a whole twenty minutes to speak, plus the dreaded five minute Q&A that follows.
However, I'm having an issue of a cramping nature...so I am going to have a pharmaceutical intervention, a hot shower, and then I will be ready to get to work.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Nurse Follies: A Moment of Temporary Insanity
At my job, they often have inservices and whatnot for nurses. Often presented by doctors, clinicians, and other people with a working knowledge of what is being presented. By attending, we get free continuing education credits that we can apply towards our licensure.
With me so far?
Quite a few months ago, my unit educator sent out this email asking if anyone would be willing to volunteer to help present at one of these hour-long inservices on a particular disease process that we see a lot of on my floor. Because I have a background in public speaking, a wizard at power point, and a momentary lapse in judgement, I volunteered. However, the stipulation was that the unit educator share in the responsibility.
Since that time, my unit educator has quit her job, and gone to work as a clinician in the pulmonary clinic...the very clinic that oversees patients with the very disease process that this inservice is about.
Still with me??
I emailed my former educator and asked if she was still going to help with the presentation, because she still works for the hospital, but in another department. She replies that she is unable to because the docs in her office prefer that their clinicians not present at the inservices. The moral of the story: Heather gets to present all by herself.
I haven't started on the power point. I only have a crude outline of what I am going to talk about. And I'm this close to pissing myself out of sheer nervousness.
The inservice is next Tuesday.
To make it even better, some asshole posted a flyer in the break room about it. My name is listed right under Dr. Prestigious as guest speaker...now the entire floor is making plans to come and listen.
Oh...I'm not nervous about speaking. I used to compete in speech and debate. Five points from making it to national competition once. Speaking in front of large groups is something I will have to get used to because I plan on finishing my nursing career in a teaching capacity.
No, what has my stomach in a knot is the audience. I'll be speaking to nurses who have been in practice years longer than me AND some doctors as well. Heather will be lecturing for doctors. And Heather will be lecturing for coworkers, some of whom I suspect would like to see me fall flat on my face.
And I have nothing to wear.
What in the hell was I thinking when I volunteered for this in the first place?!?!?!
With me so far?
Quite a few months ago, my unit educator sent out this email asking if anyone would be willing to volunteer to help present at one of these hour-long inservices on a particular disease process that we see a lot of on my floor. Because I have a background in public speaking, a wizard at power point, and a momentary lapse in judgement, I volunteered. However, the stipulation was that the unit educator share in the responsibility.
Since that time, my unit educator has quit her job, and gone to work as a clinician in the pulmonary clinic...the very clinic that oversees patients with the very disease process that this inservice is about.
Still with me??
I emailed my former educator and asked if she was still going to help with the presentation, because she still works for the hospital, but in another department. She replies that she is unable to because the docs in her office prefer that their clinicians not present at the inservices. The moral of the story: Heather gets to present all by herself.
I haven't started on the power point. I only have a crude outline of what I am going to talk about. And I'm this close to pissing myself out of sheer nervousness.
The inservice is next Tuesday.
To make it even better, some asshole posted a flyer in the break room about it. My name is listed right under Dr. Prestigious as guest speaker...now the entire floor is making plans to come and listen.
Oh...I'm not nervous about speaking. I used to compete in speech and debate. Five points from making it to national competition once. Speaking in front of large groups is something I will have to get used to because I plan on finishing my nursing career in a teaching capacity.
No, what has my stomach in a knot is the audience. I'll be speaking to nurses who have been in practice years longer than me AND some doctors as well. Heather will be lecturing for doctors. And Heather will be lecturing for coworkers, some of whom I suspect would like to see me fall flat on my face.
And I have nothing to wear.
What in the hell was I thinking when I volunteered for this in the first place?!?!?!
Invasion of the New Neighbors
A few days since my last post, and I feel like I've been out of the loop. Sheesh!!
Yesterday, I came home from work to see Mom and Mr. Recommendation sitting in the driveway of their soon-to-be house. It was Inspection Day...the inspection scheduled for 3pm, but they came early to wait for the utility people to show up and turn everything on. Utility people suck. They give you the "We'll be there between 7am and 4pm" like people have nothing better to do than wait for them to show up. Bastards.
An inspection wasn't required because the house is being sold as-is, but they wanted it to make sure it wasn't a money pit. I stayed up a little, but my need for sleep won out so I went to my own house and went to bed.
When I came to, it was 4 in the afternoon and the inspection was in full swing. The inspector being the same guy who did my house a little over a year ago. The guy is still ridiculously hot...and ridiculously married. Rats!! He did remember my name when he heard who was referring. I'd like to think it's because of my sweet ass, but it's probably more for my unusual last name...and maybe a little because of my sweet ass. You'd better believe that if he hadn't been married, we would have had a date by the end of this week. I guarantee it.
At any rate, the inspection goes off without a hitch. The inspector is so thorough, that if anyone in the house had hemorrhoids, he would have found those also. Most of his findings were cosmetic in nature, and nothing serious. Mom still worries because when he rattles off his findings, it sounds like a lot.
Of the house...a nice, raised ranch with a big Great Room with a cathedral ceiling...kind of like mine. Same parquet flooring. Same kind of drop-in oven like what's in my house. Probably even built by the same builder. We deduce that the previous occupants had moved in sometime in 2003...and hadn't cleaned the carpets the entire time they lived there. The previous occupants were also victims of either being color blind, or just having poor taste. In every room was a different color of carpet, and all colors being fugly and date back to the 80's. There's some weird wall paper in the kitchen-dining room that make you think of the Easter Bunny.
Most people recoil when I mention my mother is moving next door. They voice doubt at having to live so close to their parents. Really, it's not a big deal to me. I feel better about having her closer, especially since I know she's collapsed on occasion when no one was there to help. At least with her closer, I will be able to keep an eye on her. It pays to have a nurse living right next door to you. Not to mention I benefit because I know exactly who my neighbors are, instead of Tweakers who want to set up "kitchen" in the basement. It's win-win for everyone.
Today, I am going to go out in the frigid temps (I wish Mother Nature would make up her mind already) and visit a couple home improvement stores in search for a new shower pan. The time is upon us to start remodeling the master bathroom. Right now, all I can decide on is the shower pan. As far as tiles, the sink, the vanity, and the faucets go, the jury is still out.
Yesterday, I came home from work to see Mom and Mr. Recommendation sitting in the driveway of their soon-to-be house. It was Inspection Day...the inspection scheduled for 3pm, but they came early to wait for the utility people to show up and turn everything on. Utility people suck. They give you the "We'll be there between 7am and 4pm" like people have nothing better to do than wait for them to show up. Bastards.
An inspection wasn't required because the house is being sold as-is, but they wanted it to make sure it wasn't a money pit. I stayed up a little, but my need for sleep won out so I went to my own house and went to bed.
When I came to, it was 4 in the afternoon and the inspection was in full swing. The inspector being the same guy who did my house a little over a year ago. The guy is still ridiculously hot...and ridiculously married. Rats!! He did remember my name when he heard who was referring. I'd like to think it's because of my sweet ass, but it's probably more for my unusual last name...and maybe a little because of my sweet ass. You'd better believe that if he hadn't been married, we would have had a date by the end of this week. I guarantee it.
At any rate, the inspection goes off without a hitch. The inspector is so thorough, that if anyone in the house had hemorrhoids, he would have found those also. Most of his findings were cosmetic in nature, and nothing serious. Mom still worries because when he rattles off his findings, it sounds like a lot.
Of the house...a nice, raised ranch with a big Great Room with a cathedral ceiling...kind of like mine. Same parquet flooring. Same kind of drop-in oven like what's in my house. Probably even built by the same builder. We deduce that the previous occupants had moved in sometime in 2003...and hadn't cleaned the carpets the entire time they lived there. The previous occupants were also victims of either being color blind, or just having poor taste. In every room was a different color of carpet, and all colors being fugly and date back to the 80's. There's some weird wall paper in the kitchen-dining room that make you think of the Easter Bunny.
Most people recoil when I mention my mother is moving next door. They voice doubt at having to live so close to their parents. Really, it's not a big deal to me. I feel better about having her closer, especially since I know she's collapsed on occasion when no one was there to help. At least with her closer, I will be able to keep an eye on her. It pays to have a nurse living right next door to you. Not to mention I benefit because I know exactly who my neighbors are, instead of Tweakers who want to set up "kitchen" in the basement. It's win-win for everyone.
Today, I am going to go out in the frigid temps (I wish Mother Nature would make up her mind already) and visit a couple home improvement stores in search for a new shower pan. The time is upon us to start remodeling the master bathroom. Right now, all I can decide on is the shower pan. As far as tiles, the sink, the vanity, and the faucets go, the jury is still out.
Friday, January 25, 2008
Wanted!!
A man!! (or woman) To help create a banner for my blog. I have a couple ideas, but I'm computer stupid and I really at a loss.
(Hey, I bet you couldn't give an enema as good as I do...so no making fun of my computer skillz!)
Let me know in the comments box, or just drop me an email if you are interested in being helpful and flexing your html know-how. I promise to be easily impressed.
I pay in beer. And blog accolades.
(Hey, I bet you couldn't give an enema as good as I do...so no making fun of my computer skillz!)
Let me know in the comments box, or just drop me an email if you are interested in being helpful and flexing your html know-how. I promise to be easily impressed.
I pay in beer. And blog accolades.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
A Poem
I found this beautiful winter poem, and thought it might be a comfort to everyone. It was to me. And it's very well written.
"WINTER"
a poem by Abigail Elizabeth McIntyre...
a poem by Abigail Elizabeth McIntyre...
"SHIT, It's COLD!!"
The End.
School's Out Forever
So the KCMO School District booted their latest Superintendent.
Boy, no one saw that coming!
Actually, I'm not all that shocked. The KCMOSD is what we medical professionals like to call a train wreck. There's so many things wrong with it, you just don't know where to start to fix it.
I've always been suspicious of the KCMO school board itself. How many of the board members actually have kids who are in the system? Back in the day of growing up in smaller towns, the people who sat on the board were parents. If someone sat on the board didn't have kids, people just looked at them like "What the hell are you doing here??"
Maybe the state should step in and take over the district, just like they did in St. Louis. It would render the school board impotent (heh!) and maybe something would actually get accomplished, like oh, I don't know, the schools getting their accreditation back.
Boy, no one saw that coming!
Actually, I'm not all that shocked. The KCMOSD is what we medical professionals like to call a train wreck. There's so many things wrong with it, you just don't know where to start to fix it.
I've always been suspicious of the KCMO school board itself. How many of the board members actually have kids who are in the system? Back in the day of growing up in smaller towns, the people who sat on the board were parents. If someone sat on the board didn't have kids, people just looked at them like "What the hell are you doing here??"
Maybe the state should step in and take over the district, just like they did in St. Louis. It would render the school board impotent (heh!) and maybe something would actually get accomplished, like oh, I don't know, the schools getting their accreditation back.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Observations From the Treadmill
I had another rendezvous with the elliptical machine tonight. After my 45 minute romp, I was sweaty, tired, and ready to just roll over and fall asleep.
For someone who really doesn't care for large crowds of people, I do love to people watch. This probably stems from my early church years when Kant and I would sit at church dances and make snarky remarks about the Mollies trying to dance like Britney Spears in an effort to snag them an E.C. (that's Eternal Companion for you gentiles).
At any rate, with the gym, people watching is either hit or miss, depending on when you go. Last night's workout was apparently Teen Night as gaggles of the pubescent bunch were roaming around the gym. None of them wearing body deodorant.
Tonight, there was no real theme really. Just an interesting mix of people. I could see them all from my perch. It was almost like one of those Mutual of Omaha shows about wild animals in their habitat.
In front of me is a guy, late teens or early twenties, that looks like Ron Howard before he lost his hair. He's pedaling on the recumbent bike, while flipping through channels. Thankfully, he turned off Who's the Biggerst Skanky Whore hosted by Bret Michaels' wig. Then, I smelled it. A fart so rank, I could feel the my nose hairs disintegrate. Glancing around, I deduced the noxious fumes emitted from Opie. I covered my face with my blue workout towel until the threat of oxygen deprivation passed. Just a word of advice, if you plan on blowing ass, please remove yourself to a place where people are not right behind you.
Opie got off the bike shortly afterward, gave me a sheepish grin, and left. Hopefully, it was to go check his shorts.
Meanwhile, two girls enter, both relatively young tanorexics with bleached blonde hair, full makeup, and fake hooters. Accompanying them was some dude that I suspect was their handler, manager, pimp...whatever. (I'm guessing they couldn't find their way to Gold's Gym?)
One girl had the word "pink" in glitter on her ass. I assumed that was her special way of advertising.
Paris 2.0 and 2.1 set up shop on the ab machines that are also in front of me, off to the right. From my vantage point, I can see down their little tank tops. So can everyone else. Nestled in the safe confines of their silicone, are their cell phones. They would do half-assed crunches, stop, whip out their phones for some texting, finish, put their phones back in their handy little holders, and the whole scene would reply itself over and over again. Maybe they were booking, ahem, dates for later. Isn't that something their handler should have taken care of?
Off to my left is a guy grunting and straining on another elliptical machine. I watch him out of the corner of my eye because he looks like he's going to keel over with a massive coronary. I take note of the defibrillator hanging by the front desk.
Some dude is working the weight machines, rocking the crusty denim jeans that look like he's been laying under a car all day. He catches my eye and smiles a big grin with missing teeth. I vomit in my mouth a little.
Then, there are your guys who practically live in the free weights section. Their arms and chests are so big, I'm tempted to go untie their shoes for entertainment. Guys that big can't bend over and reach their shoes because they are so ripped. Someone should tell them that hitting the juice will cause their penises to shrivel up. I'm just saying...
Just in case anyone was wondering, there were no Gorilla sightings.
So, now I am safe within the warm confines of my home. I will now retire for the night. Who knows what tomorrow will bring.
For someone who really doesn't care for large crowds of people, I do love to people watch. This probably stems from my early church years when Kant and I would sit at church dances and make snarky remarks about the Mollies trying to dance like Britney Spears in an effort to snag them an E.C. (that's Eternal Companion for you gentiles).
At any rate, with the gym, people watching is either hit or miss, depending on when you go. Last night's workout was apparently Teen Night as gaggles of the pubescent bunch were roaming around the gym. None of them wearing body deodorant.
Tonight, there was no real theme really. Just an interesting mix of people. I could see them all from my perch. It was almost like one of those Mutual of Omaha shows about wild animals in their habitat.
In front of me is a guy, late teens or early twenties, that looks like Ron Howard before he lost his hair. He's pedaling on the recumbent bike, while flipping through channels. Thankfully, he turned off Who's the Biggerst Skanky Whore hosted by Bret Michaels' wig. Then, I smelled it. A fart so rank, I could feel the my nose hairs disintegrate. Glancing around, I deduced the noxious fumes emitted from Opie. I covered my face with my blue workout towel until the threat of oxygen deprivation passed. Just a word of advice, if you plan on blowing ass, please remove yourself to a place where people are not right behind you.
Opie got off the bike shortly afterward, gave me a sheepish grin, and left. Hopefully, it was to go check his shorts.
Meanwhile, two girls enter, both relatively young tanorexics with bleached blonde hair, full makeup, and fake hooters. Accompanying them was some dude that I suspect was their handler, manager, pimp...whatever. (I'm guessing they couldn't find their way to Gold's Gym?)
One girl had the word "pink" in glitter on her ass. I assumed that was her special way of advertising.
Paris 2.0 and 2.1 set up shop on the ab machines that are also in front of me, off to the right. From my vantage point, I can see down their little tank tops. So can everyone else. Nestled in the safe confines of their silicone, are their cell phones. They would do half-assed crunches, stop, whip out their phones for some texting, finish, put their phones back in their handy little holders, and the whole scene would reply itself over and over again. Maybe they were booking, ahem, dates for later. Isn't that something their handler should have taken care of?
Off to my left is a guy grunting and straining on another elliptical machine. I watch him out of the corner of my eye because he looks like he's going to keel over with a massive coronary. I take note of the defibrillator hanging by the front desk.
Some dude is working the weight machines, rocking the crusty denim jeans that look like he's been laying under a car all day. He catches my eye and smiles a big grin with missing teeth. I vomit in my mouth a little.
Then, there are your guys who practically live in the free weights section. Their arms and chests are so big, I'm tempted to go untie their shoes for entertainment. Guys that big can't bend over and reach their shoes because they are so ripped. Someone should tell them that hitting the juice will cause their penises to shrivel up. I'm just saying...
Just in case anyone was wondering, there were no Gorilla sightings.
So, now I am safe within the warm confines of my home. I will now retire for the night. Who knows what tomorrow will bring.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Heath Ledger!!
Holy Shit!
No one saw this coming. My friends and I are shocked and dismayed.
Nobody had him on their Celebrity Death List.
At 28, that's MUCHO points.
No one saw this coming. My friends and I are shocked and dismayed.
Nobody had him on their Celebrity Death List.
At 28, that's MUCHO points.
Monday, January 21, 2008
The Rabbit Bandit Strikes
In Springfield (Missouri, y'all) someone drove their minivan into various adult stores and absconded with sex toys.
One has to wonder just what kind of sex toys they took. The Two Foot Double Ended Pink Jelly Dong, perhaps?? Hope they remembered to grab the lube.
And then you have to wonder just what they plan on doing with them. Christmas presents??
Even more interesting, the thief was driving a minivan.
Hah! I didn't know the repressed soccer Moms of JoCo were willing to drive all the way to Springfield.
This story is full of snarky goodness, I just don't know where to begin.
One has to wonder just what kind of sex toys they took. The Two Foot Double Ended Pink Jelly Dong, perhaps?? Hope they remembered to grab the lube.
And then you have to wonder just what they plan on doing with them. Christmas presents??
Even more interesting, the thief was driving a minivan.
Hah! I didn't know the repressed soccer Moms of JoCo were willing to drive all the way to Springfield.
This story is full of snarky goodness, I just don't know where to begin.
I am a Rock (Simon and Garfunkel)
I borrowed this from Average Jane.
Directions:
1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, iPod etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
1. IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY? Until I Collapse (Eminem)
2. HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF? El Phantasmo and the Chicken Run Blast-o-Rama (White Zombie)
3. WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL? Into the Ocean (Blue October)
4. HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY? She's a Lady (Tom Jones)
5. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE? Go West (Pet Shop Boys)
6. WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO? Cadillac Ranch (Chris LeDoux)
7. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU? Next Contestant (Nickelback)
8. WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU? Round Here (Counting Crows)
9. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN? Love Me In a Special Way (El Debarge)
10. WHAT IS 2 + 2? Spanish Gypsy Dance (Mantovani Orchestra)
11. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR EX? Somewhere in the Vicinity of the Heart (Alison Krauss)
12. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE? One (Metallica)
13. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY? Space Walk (Lemon Jelly)
14. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP? Someone Like You (Linda Eder)
15. WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE? Lips of an Angel (Hinder)
16. WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL? Down Home (Alabama)
17. WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST? Reflection (Christina Aguilera)
18. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR? Feed Jake (Pirates of the Mississippi)
19. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET? Stuck on You (Lionel Richie)
20. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS? There for Me (Sarah Brightman)
Now press Next one more time and use it as your title.
Directions:
1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, iPod etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
1. IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY? Until I Collapse (Eminem)
2. HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF? El Phantasmo and the Chicken Run Blast-o-Rama (White Zombie)
3. WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL? Into the Ocean (Blue October)
4. HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY? She's a Lady (Tom Jones)
5. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE? Go West (Pet Shop Boys)
6. WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO? Cadillac Ranch (Chris LeDoux)
7. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU? Next Contestant (Nickelback)
8. WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU? Round Here (Counting Crows)
9. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN? Love Me In a Special Way (El Debarge)
10. WHAT IS 2 + 2? Spanish Gypsy Dance (Mantovani Orchestra)
11. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR EX? Somewhere in the Vicinity of the Heart (Alison Krauss)
12. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE? One (Metallica)
13. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY? Space Walk (Lemon Jelly)
14. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP? Someone Like You (Linda Eder)
15. WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE? Lips of an Angel (Hinder)
16. WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL? Down Home (Alabama)
17. WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST? Reflection (Christina Aguilera)
18. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR? Feed Jake (Pirates of the Mississippi)
19. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET? Stuck on You (Lionel Richie)
20. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS? There for Me (Sarah Brightman)
Now press Next one more time and use it as your title.
Monday's Musings
Today, January 21st, is said to be the most depressing day of the year. Under normal circumstances, I would say that was a load of crap.
Today, I'm willing to believe it.
Overall, a crap weekend. I sent one of my patients to the ICU, only to have them die in the morning. It was even a nice patient. It's always the nice ones that die prematurely, which would explain why there are a lot of assholes running around in the world.
Every time a good person dies, an asshole gets their wings. I should cross-stitch that on a sampler or something.
I had another patient try to go down the crapper on me last night. They were not too successful in their attempt. Perhaps they were that pissed that Green Bay lost.
To cap off the weekend, some assclown ran and red light and almost t-boned me. Dumbass.
There are other reasons I am annoyed, of which I won't elaborate. Give me five more minutes and I will be over it.
Actually, I think I'm going to go to bed before the house caves in or something. Maybe that black cloud that has been following me around all weekend will move on to that crabass that lives next door. The old fart husband parked some old Ford POS in front of my house, with the a flat front tire on the lawn, and it has been sitting in that same spot for the past 3 months or so. I don't know why they couldn't park their turd in front of their house and decrease their own property value, but I'm sure the mailman is thrilled when he has to get out of his warm little truck to get to my mailbox to deliver my coupons from Bed, Bath, and Beyond.
I'm signing off for the rest of the day. Maybe my faith in the human race (or more specifically, men) will be restored when I wake up this afternoon.
But it's unlikely.
Today, I'm willing to believe it.
Overall, a crap weekend. I sent one of my patients to the ICU, only to have them die in the morning. It was even a nice patient. It's always the nice ones that die prematurely, which would explain why there are a lot of assholes running around in the world.
Every time a good person dies, an asshole gets their wings. I should cross-stitch that on a sampler or something.
I had another patient try to go down the crapper on me last night. They were not too successful in their attempt. Perhaps they were that pissed that Green Bay lost.
To cap off the weekend, some assclown ran and red light and almost t-boned me. Dumbass.
There are other reasons I am annoyed, of which I won't elaborate. Give me five more minutes and I will be over it.
Actually, I think I'm going to go to bed before the house caves in or something. Maybe that black cloud that has been following me around all weekend will move on to that crabass that lives next door. The old fart husband parked some old Ford POS in front of my house, with the a flat front tire on the lawn, and it has been sitting in that same spot for the past 3 months or so. I don't know why they couldn't park their turd in front of their house and decrease their own property value, but I'm sure the mailman is thrilled when he has to get out of his warm little truck to get to my mailbox to deliver my coupons from Bed, Bath, and Beyond.
I'm signing off for the rest of the day. Maybe my faith in the human race (or more specifically, men) will be restored when I wake up this afternoon.
But it's unlikely.
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Genius. Pure Genius
| You Are 85% Tortured Genius |
 You totally fit the profile of a tortured genius. You're uniquely brilliant - and completely misunderstood. Not like you really want anyone to understand you anyway. You're pretty happy being an island. |
Saturday, January 19, 2008
KC Blogger Meeting Rundown
Because it was actually held on a weeknight, I attended the KC Blogger meet up at Cafe al Dente. I'd never been to this place before, but it was easy to find. Actually, I haven't been to a lot of places at City Market. I'm going to have to go there when the weather gets warmer and have a look around. I hear they have some pretty cool shops.
Some of the usual suspects graced us with their presence: XO, Spyder, Emaw, Faith and her new hubby, Leo (they arrived later), Average Jane and M Toast. Michelle popped in for a quick hello. Chimpo brought the very pregnant Mrs. Chimpo, and everyone wondered how he was able to land such a nice and pretty girl.
I finally got to meet the exotic Meesha, my online paramour. I would have liked to talk to him more...but it's kind of hard to get to know someone when everyone else is watching closely. It was almost like everyone was waiting for something to happen...like me throwing him on the table and demonstrating why Muslim extremists really hate Americans.
Irish KC brought the Irish accent. At one point, I was going to hand him a menu and have him read it to me. I'm a fan of foreign accents. I also lobbied for a cartoon with my name on it because I am a shameless famewhore like that. I thought a nurse named Heather would be a great character.
Many things were discussed. Chimpo offered to show off his toe (to which everyone declined). Spyder kept going on and on about her "bend over space". Almost everyone ordered a calzone (and they are every bit as good as advertised). Meesha ordered some strange lemon dessert thing the was frozen so solid, I could have lobbed it at Chimpo's head and given him a concussion. Faith brought wedding/honeymoon pics (I suspect she left the interesting ones at home).
And no one got called a Commie.
Good to see old faces, and new ones. Missed the regulars who didn't show, but look forward to seeing everyone at the next meet up.
Some of the usual suspects graced us with their presence: XO, Spyder, Emaw, Faith and her new hubby, Leo (they arrived later), Average Jane and M Toast. Michelle popped in for a quick hello. Chimpo brought the very pregnant Mrs. Chimpo, and everyone wondered how he was able to land such a nice and pretty girl.
I finally got to meet the exotic Meesha, my online paramour. I would have liked to talk to him more...but it's kind of hard to get to know someone when everyone else is watching closely. It was almost like everyone was waiting for something to happen...like me throwing him on the table and demonstrating why Muslim extremists really hate Americans.
Irish KC brought the Irish accent. At one point, I was going to hand him a menu and have him read it to me. I'm a fan of foreign accents. I also lobbied for a cartoon with my name on it because I am a shameless famewhore like that. I thought a nurse named Heather would be a great character.
Many things were discussed. Chimpo offered to show off his toe (to which everyone declined). Spyder kept going on and on about her "bend over space". Almost everyone ordered a calzone (and they are every bit as good as advertised). Meesha ordered some strange lemon dessert thing the was frozen so solid, I could have lobbed it at Chimpo's head and given him a concussion. Faith brought wedding/honeymoon pics (I suspect she left the interesting ones at home).
And no one got called a Commie.
Good to see old faces, and new ones. Missed the regulars who didn't show, but look forward to seeing everyone at the next meet up.
Ugh!
When you come on at the beginning of the shift, and the day nurse begins by saying, "This patient should be in the ICU," She may as well just say, "Bend over and grab your ankles. You're going to feel like you've been sodomized by a train for 12 straight hours."
And I have two more nights of this.
~Sobs hysterically~
And I have two more nights of this.
~Sobs hysterically~
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Uhhhh
| You Are Ani Difranco! |
 Honest, real, and well liked. You're not limited by any boundaries. "And you can call me crazy But I think you're as lazy as white paint on the wall" |
I knew a guy who loved Ani.
I have no idea who she is. I think I will go find some music by her so I will be "in the know".
Don't Forget!!
KC Bloggers Gathering
Cafe al Dente, in the River Market at Fourth & Delaware, Kansas City, Mo
Thursday January 17th 2008
5pm to last person standing
Cafe al Dente, in the River Market at Fourth & Delaware, Kansas City, Mo
Thursday January 17th 2008
5pm to last person standing
I keep hearing all this talk of the calzones, so they must be good.
Come on down. It's not like there's anything on t.v. tonight.
See ya there!
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
To Stay or To Go
For the second week in a row, I had to go to work for meetings. We are hiring a new educator for our unit, and I am on the interview committee. Fun. For. Me.
The interviews went as interviews go...nothing I would classify as fun. I wonder if the interviewees are as terrified as I am bored. Being on the interview committee is quite helpful...I learn what I should and should not do.
After my very important meetings, another nurse (who is also my gay boyfriend) and myself went to Cafe Trio for eats and drinks. We must have stayed there forever. We managed to solve all the problems of our unit and we even squeezed in time to bitch about men.
On the way home, a car spun out in the middle of Broadway as the white stuff wafted down from the heavens. I managed to make it home without someone careening into me.
So, now I sit here. Periodically looking at the window. The streets don't look too bad around my house, and those are usually more worse for wear than the main streets and highways.
Should I chance it and go to the gym, or just call it a night and go to bed? I do have to get up early for another meeting, and even risking going out for an hour on an elliptical machine sounds silly.
Meh. I think I will just go to bed. I'll make sure to do some crunches before I do.
The interviews went as interviews go...nothing I would classify as fun. I wonder if the interviewees are as terrified as I am bored. Being on the interview committee is quite helpful...I learn what I should and should not do.
After my very important meetings, another nurse (who is also my gay boyfriend) and myself went to Cafe Trio for eats and drinks. We must have stayed there forever. We managed to solve all the problems of our unit and we even squeezed in time to bitch about men.
On the way home, a car spun out in the middle of Broadway as the white stuff wafted down from the heavens. I managed to make it home without someone careening into me.
So, now I sit here. Periodically looking at the window. The streets don't look too bad around my house, and those are usually more worse for wear than the main streets and highways.
Should I chance it and go to the gym, or just call it a night and go to bed? I do have to get up early for another meeting, and even risking going out for an hour on an elliptical machine sounds silly.
Meh. I think I will just go to bed. I'll make sure to do some crunches before I do.
Go Away, No Wait a Minute
In my effort to maintain my new love affair with the elliptical machine, I went to the gym tonight. I like to go late because I don't have to wait for machines, and I don't have to suffer the prancing of skinny little blondes who are there for reasons other than working out. You know the ones.
I perched myself upon the elliptical machine of my choosing and began my workout. At my gym, the cardio-theater faces the rest of the gym. So, I can either watch the televisions, or I can watch other people working out. Sometimes I will do both, contingent on if anything good is playing on one of the six screens.
I recently updated my workout play list on my iPod, so I was moving at a fairly good clip. The new sports bra I recently invested in proved to be a sound investment.
New sports bra + good tunes = good workout
Of the gym inhabitants tonight, there was a Tweeker who was just roaming around the gym. I have no idea what she was up to. There were a couple muscle heads. A handful of normal folks like myself that probably go late at night for the same reasons I do. Of the bunch, there was a guy, built like a brick shithouse (he had to have been 6'5"), with red hair.
It's kind of hard to miss the red heads, so I watched as he did his little workout. He kept going to this one machine, and he was using it wrong. I know this because my trainer once berated me for using the same machine the wrong way. Once you get an ass-chewing of such nature, it's hard to forget.
After my session on the elliptical machine, I gathered my bag of workout stuff and started to leave. Someone called out, "Hey, Red!" I turned and it was the Red Headed Gorilla smiling at me.
Yes, I know...Heather brings the heat. However, what I don't bring is a lot of finesse when it comes to strange guys approaching me. So, I did what I normally do in such situations.
I waved, smiled, and ran away.
If I know a guy, it's a little easier for me to be flirty. I'm not like those girls who can throw it out there in bars and clubs. Who dance on bars. Who can be seen on a Girls Gone Wild dvd.
You know, the kind of girls that The D likes to go out with.
No, I'm usually the girl that the guys crawl over to get to the aforementioned females. You're loss, fellas.
Anyway, I'm home now. Safe from being talked to by strange men. Man, they might do something scary...like ask me out for coffee. Or worse...want to exchange phone numbers.
Phew!!
God, I'm so pathetic.
I perched myself upon the elliptical machine of my choosing and began my workout. At my gym, the cardio-theater faces the rest of the gym. So, I can either watch the televisions, or I can watch other people working out. Sometimes I will do both, contingent on if anything good is playing on one of the six screens.
I recently updated my workout play list on my iPod, so I was moving at a fairly good clip. The new sports bra I recently invested in proved to be a sound investment.
New sports bra + good tunes = good workout
Of the gym inhabitants tonight, there was a Tweeker who was just roaming around the gym. I have no idea what she was up to. There were a couple muscle heads. A handful of normal folks like myself that probably go late at night for the same reasons I do. Of the bunch, there was a guy, built like a brick shithouse (he had to have been 6'5"), with red hair.
It's kind of hard to miss the red heads, so I watched as he did his little workout. He kept going to this one machine, and he was using it wrong. I know this because my trainer once berated me for using the same machine the wrong way. Once you get an ass-chewing of such nature, it's hard to forget.
After my session on the elliptical machine, I gathered my bag of workout stuff and started to leave. Someone called out, "Hey, Red!" I turned and it was the Red Headed Gorilla smiling at me.
Yes, I know...Heather brings the heat. However, what I don't bring is a lot of finesse when it comes to strange guys approaching me. So, I did what I normally do in such situations.
I waved, smiled, and ran away.
If I know a guy, it's a little easier for me to be flirty. I'm not like those girls who can throw it out there in bars and clubs. Who dance on bars. Who can be seen on a Girls Gone Wild dvd.
You know, the kind of girls that The D likes to go out with.
No, I'm usually the girl that the guys crawl over to get to the aforementioned females. You're loss, fellas.
Anyway, I'm home now. Safe from being talked to by strange men. Man, they might do something scary...like ask me out for coffee. Or worse...want to exchange phone numbers.
Phew!!
God, I'm so pathetic.
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