Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Coretta Day

Today was Coretta Scott King's funeral and the city of Atlanta came to a standstill right around lunctime.

Thousands attended. It took 4-5 hours for the people to actually make it into the church where the funeral was being held. The funeral itself was almost 6 hours long. Five of those hours it took to get to the eulogy.

The Longest. Funeral. Ever.

I hope they remembered to pack a lunch.

Right about now, the funeral procession is tying up rush hour traffic. Those who had the misfortune of missing the funeral and made the commute to work, should be getting home right around midnight.

I hope they remembered to pack a dinner.

The funeral program was 28 pages long. I know small town phone books that have less pages.

It was broadcasted on television and radio. Now, the news is rehashing the event...so in case you missed it during the day, you can catch up on it at night. For those who missed General Hospital, you will have to wait until 1am to find out what happened with the virus-plague that is terrorizing Port Charles.

Stevie Wonder sang. Ordinarily, I like Stevie Wonder...but he sounded like he was constipated. Poor Stevie Wonder. Did you know that prolonged periods of immobility will cause constipation? If I had to sit through a 6 hour funeral, I probably would be constipated as well.

And what funeral would be complete without Old Fred and his gang showing up to protest. What they were protesting at Coretta's funeral, I don't know. Probably the usual...God Hates Fags, God Hates America, blah, blah, blah.

God Hates Fred.

Someone needs to round up the entire clan beat their collective ass.

So ends Coretta Day.

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