Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Because Nothing Says "Happy Holidays" Like a Funeral

Upon arriving home from my holiday at the lake, Mom calls me to tell me that her best friend's father passed away on Christmas Eve...and would I mind going with her to the viewing that night??

Why's not like I had anything better to do.

So, we dress in somber-wear and go to a local funeral home where Mom's friend greets us at the door. I do feel sorry for anyone who loses a loved one so close to the holidays. He had been chronically ill with respiratory ailments stemming from long-term smoking. For him, death was a blessing.

To honor his passing, the entire family gathers outside the funeral home and proceeds to light up. I'm fairly certain that my mother and myself were the only ones there who didn't smoke, except the 8 year olds. There was a man there, who was as big around as he was tall, and looked as though he would be the guest of honor for the next funeral the family would attend. He was toting a portable oxygen tank...

And smoking...

At the same time.

I overheard one family member mention that he couldn't figure out how to turn off the tank. I casually eased mother to a safer distance and told her she was not allowed to be anywhere near this man...for he could blow at any minute, therby taking out anyone within a 25 foot radius.

I'm always amazed at people who have a family member that dies from smoking-related illnesses, and yet they keep on puffing. Are they just in denial that such a horrible fate could not possibly happen to them? Whatever the case may be, one thing is for long as people smoke, my job will always be secure.


RCH said...

OMG, DH had a patient once in the cardiac ICU who was on oxygen ... and who lit up a cigarette THERE IN THE HOSPITAL, IN THE FREAKING ICU, WHILE ATTACHED TO HIS OXYGEN.

Truly, stupidity knows no bounds for some people. I imagine we'll be reading about either / both of those guys real soon in the Darwin Awards.

t. durden said...

Great merciful crap. Everyday I'm convinced that stupidity is contagious.

Here's to you Heather and wishing you a Happy and Wonderful New Year.