Monday, December 12, 2005

Why Apartment Living Sucks Ass

I went out today to do laundry. I have to lug my laundry across the apartment complex to their overpriced laundry facility. $1.25 to wash, $1.25 to dry...and they are not even commercial washers and dryers. So, I notice a nice little dent on my fender that wasn't there before. A dent about the size of a golf ball.

I hate apartment living.
I hate that I have to leave the warm confines of my abode to have clean underwear and scrubs.
I hate that I have a car buried in snow whenever there is inclement weather. When I do clear my parking space of snow, some bastard comes along and takes it after I leave.
I hate that I can hear my neighbors upstairs shagging when I am trying to sleep.
I hate that my car gets all kinds of dings and dents because everyone else who lives in my building drives a piece of crap (with the exception of my mother), and doesn't care if they damage my car or not.
I hate that I now have a commercial toilet in my bathroom. (I still hate the toilet.)
I hate that crabby woman who lives across the hall who thinks I am after her bloated, old husband.
Hate! Hate! Hate!

I can't wait to buy my own house, with a garage, a washer and dryer, a yard, and a regular toilet.

I curse the asshat who put the dent in my car. I curse them with sexual dysfunction until they are old and senile and no one will sleep with them. Oh yeah, I curse them with herpes as well.

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