Wednesday, November 28, 2007

The Most Craptastic Thing This Week

I was home, recovering from Sunday's festivities, flipping through some channels, when I stumbled upon this little gem of a show on CMT. It's called Mobile Home Disaster and is essentially the equivalent of Extreme Makeover for the trailer park crowd. Because of my unhealthy obsession with trailer parks, my eyes just glazed over and I watched.

The family featured a mom, a dad, and their six children...all living in the crappiest trailer I've seen. Well, maybe not the crappiest, but certainly in the top ten. It was really crappy. The three sons slept on the couch, the three girls slept in their own little room on beds that didn't have sheets. Instead of curtains, they had blankets and sheets up. The place was as stereotypical as one could get as far as mobile homes was the family, whom I am confident could tell you the glories of government cheese.

So, Bill Engvall and his team go in and pretty much rebuild this trailer and make it southern fried fabulous. The boys get their own room, the girls get their own room (with sheets on the bed!). The parents get their room redone with curtains (it looks like a hotel room). The end result doesn't look bad, and it's a HUGE improvement from their living conditions before.

The family returns to the trailer park for the big reveal. The entire trailer park turns out and you'd be hard pressed to spot a woman wearing a bra in that group. Mother (in her bleach-blond, black-rooted goodness) blathers about how she's a new person with this new house. She's a new Mom now!!

What?!? They just redid your house, they didn't give you a personality makeover. You're still a dumbass on welfare.

With all the new things that came with the newly remodeled trailer (flat panel plasma television, computer, gas bbq grill, all stainless appliances in the kitchen, furniture, etc), the thing that the parents are most excited about...they have their own soda dispenser in the shed.

I've only seen the one show. I don't know if they have any others, but I checked the website. If the show wasn't entertaining enough, you can peruse the message boards. Everyones got a sad story to tell, and everyone wants to know how they can get their trailers made over as well. It's enough to make me salivate over the prospect of new trailer park shows on the horizon. It's like being able to observe life in the park, without the fear of being caught.

It's awesome!!!


meesha.v said...

I am not a specialist in this area but why did they have to rebuild the trailer, couldn't they just put wheels on it and roll it off the cliff and then get them a new one?

IDigSmartLadies said...

Funny. My first thought, upon reading Heather's overview, was that each episode should go like this: Spend the first ten minutes introducing the family. Not so much that you grow to dislike the family, but enough that you get to think "Damn, I'm glad I'm not THEM." Cut to commercials for pocket fishermen, Boxcar Willie anthologies, and the like.

The second act consists of piling the trashiest of the family's belongings (think Elvis on velvet, dancing hamsters, talking fish mounted on plaques, etc) into the middle of the trailer and burning them. Then, they call in Adam and Jamie from Mythbusters and blow the whole thing up. More commercials, and then it's time for the third act.

The final part of the show consists of a used, but respectable (!) trailer purchased to replace the one that was accidentally blown up, which subsequently gets redone in hilbilly fabulous fasion.

Spyder said...

Kanga calls those tv shows house porn. THAT show would be trailer porn. Well at least for you Heather!

Faith said...

Wait, the message boards are filled with trailer park trash asking to have their own trailers made over?

I love it when trashy people give up on everything (even birth control!), but still have a computer with an internet connection in the house. Bless 'em!