Saturday, September 20, 2008

Bastard Chocolate?

Quite a few years ago, a friend and I were discussing chocolate, and how she didn't care for American chocolate as it tasted waxy. A short while later, I was actually eating some chocolate that I realized she was right.

Then, I sampled some chocolate that came from our friends across the pond. I was instantly smitten. I'd be even more so if they didn't insist on putting hazelnuts in everything. I don't like hazelnuts. They are like the onions of Europe.

I recently read a news story about how Hershey (and other U.S. companies that make chocolate) has switched creamy cocoa butter for veggie oil (among other types of oil) in their chocolate confections. This certainly explained the waxy feeling of American chocolate. I was a little annoyed at that tricky chocolately goodness wording the companies slyly used so consumers wouldn't know the difference.

Hell, if I wanted veggie oil, I'd drink it straight out of the bottle. Although the mere thought of doing it is disgusting.

So, screw you, crappy American producers of Soylent Brown. I'm only eating imported chocolate from now on. Sure, I'll pay more for it, but there are some things that are worth it.

Never, EVER come between a woman and her chocolate.

8 comments:

Le Grand Lapin said...

Remember that André's at 5018 Main is also the Swiss Consulate. You can get your choco-fix from a local merchant, and still get Euro-worthy stuff. No one, either side of the pond, does chocolate better.

Xavier Onassis said...

I'm going to become seriously nauseated at the first suggestion that "Soylent Brown is PEOPLE!"

Baby Ruth's are problematic enough. Always have been.

m.v. said...

world market has a ton of imported chocolate, not all of it is that great. either they send us their crap because they think we won't know the difference or they have their own version of hershey's.

Owen said...

Love the post. Bastard chocolate is right.

Beckle the Freckle said...

Oooh! If you're ever in a British Import store, get yourself a big bar of Galaxy chocolate. You won't be sorry... MMMMmmmmmmmmm...*drools on self*

IDigSmartLadies said...

The food giants have been lobbying the FDA to redefine chocolate. Currently, it requires cocoa butter. They want to use less expensive vegetable oil. They tried, unsuccessfully, to do so last year. Now, anything with vegetable oil instead of cocoa butter is labeled "chocolate candy", rather than "milk chocolate".

Me, I just skip the suck that is milk and white chocolate, and go straight for the dark stuff.

Heather said...

I'm all about the dark chocolate. Better for you anyway.

Faith said...

Oooh, for my wedding, we got chocolates from that little place on 75th at State Line. Laura Little's. Ohmygod, so fucking good...I'd highly recommend it, since I'm pretty sure they manufacture their chocolate themselves. I could be wrong on that.