Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Extreme Makeover: Dumbass Edition

Would I be the only person in the northern hemisphere to think that ABC is ran by a bunch of retards?

Like most everyone else in KC, I was glad to see the EM crew go away. I was tired of hearing about it. Really. You'd be watching TV when late breaking news would cut into whatever show you were watching, to announce that Ty Pennington installed the bathtub. OHMYGOD! Ty Pennington installed a bathtub...RIGHT HERE IN KANSAS CITY!!!!

So, we have a family that would more than likely meet the criteria for what would constitute "poverty level" considering their size. They are also caring for a truck full of other children who belong to a relative who for whatever reasons I'd be curious to know, has lost custody of said children. I can commend the family for stepping up to the plate to take the kids in. Most people, if faced with that same situation, would do likewise. I'd do the same for my brother's kids...after I beat my brother for being a moron, and bad father.

Dad works a blue collar job...overworked and underpaid, I'm sure. Mom stays at home and cares for 12-person household. They live in a house that is 900 square feet (the average size of most apartments). It's probably safe to say that size of the house, while problematic, was probably not the most pressing matter in their lives. Twelve people on one income, and more than likely some government assistance tossed in.

So, here comes ABC with their trucks and video cameras. The family is sent away to some vacation in Florida...all expenses paid. The house is demolished, a 5,000 square foot house thrown up in it's place. It's fully loaded with all new crap, electronics, furniture, and a shit-ton of stuff that most normal people don't have in their own homes.

Oh yeah...a brand new Mustang, Expedition, and pick-up truck sit in the driveway. We've gone from humble to gluttony in the matter of 96 hours.

Now, here is the part that baffles me.

Nothing has really changed with the family dynamic. Still one income that hasn't changed, still 12 people living off it. While the most ugliest new house I've ever seen is nice, big, shiny and everyone has space to spare, the big problem...the one problem that I am sure everyone has overlooked is that this family is now going to have to pay taxes and maintenance on all of this. House, cars, vacation. More money involved in maintaining this new lifestyle. I'm pretty sure there's a big difference in the gas bill between a 900 square foot house and a 5,000 square foot house.

I'm certain that ABC will step in and pay for it, just the way Oprah paid the taxes on all those cars she "gave" away. Oh wait...she didn't.

Now, I'm reading that donations are being solicited so the family can keep this house. Are you kidding me?!? Thousands have already been collected. Call me an asshole, but I'm not going to be whipping out my checkbook anytime soon. ABC created this monster, they should be the ones who exclusively deal with it. In the long run, it seems to me that they might have made this family's life worse instead of better. Instead of maybe teaching the family a better way to fish, ABC just gave them a brand new frying pan, no pole, no instructions on how to catch fish, plus a short deadline as to when they had to have dinner ready for Uncle Sam.

Eventually, people are going to stop donating when they have to tighten their own budgets, and really can't see why they should pay for someone elses house when their own house is at risk of being foreclosed upon. When this happens, and there is no more money coming in, the family of 12 will have to sell. And when they have to sell it, who's going to buy? The price will be inflated because it was an Extreme Makeover house, but no one is going to buy because A. The market sucks and B. So does the neighborhood it was built in.

Now, if you will excuse me, I need to go turn my thermostat down and have a bologna sandwich.


Stacey K said...

That does truly suck for the family. I have a lot of kids (4, not as many as that family, just feels like it some days) and I live in a crappy house with a cheap mortgage. I feel for the family because they said yes to a dream that will probably end up being a nightmare. Not sorry enough to give them any money though. I still have 4 kids of my own to feed and agree that ABC should tame this monster they just made.

Craig said...

Maybe Frontline will do a follow-up on it called "Extreme Afluenza, Hayseed Edition".

martinoffroad said...

You are forgetting the biggest problem this family will have to face, how to fit 3 vehicles in one garage...you would think they would have built at least a 2 car garage.

lynn said...

You make some excellent points, Heather.

I've always thought that the whole idea of spending wads of money on one family, when they could help several with the same amount, is silly. Instead of building a mansion for one family, why not by new washers and dryers for a hundred families? Or pay the electric bills for an entire impoverished neighborhood for the winter? That's why I stopped watching this show long ago - I just can't justify to myself celebrating the gluttonous fortunes of one family while there are so many in need of just a tiny portion of that aid.

Faith said...

Ahh, the things that people never think about when it comes to "free" prizes. Good job putting it all down in words, sista. I would have thought that maybe a 3,000 SF house would have been enough for them. But 5,200? That's the size of my dad's place in Cali, and it ain't tiny. The maintenance on my OWN 900 SF home almost kills me each month, and I can't even imagine having to heat 4,000 more SF. (Or cool it, for that matter.) The one-car garage makes ABSOLUTELY no sense at. all. Unless there's some sort of neighborhood ordinance that doesn't allow more then a one car garage, which would also be stupid. I dunno.

I stopped watching this shit a long time a go, too. I cannot imagine how secure and well-built a house that's put up in less than a week can be. And who picked those fucking colors for this latest one? Blech.

jamie said...

Well said. I agree completely. ABC's behavior just advances the instant-gratification mindset that keeps so many people in poverty when more careful (and patient) planning could give them a way out. Think of what that family could achieve with a more modest house and money in the bank for college...? retirement...? What a waste.

ksader said...

Yes, instead of spending that money on maybe educating someone in that household, let's give them something they can't afford.

Best move for the family: sell the house, take whatever windfall they get from it and try to send some kids to college.

Paul said...

I am guessing that the garage is at least a two car tandem........and I would hope that all the taxes and increased insurance expenses would have been clearly layed out in the papers that these people surely read before they signed on the dotted line.
I actually like the design, although it may be more accepted in the Brookside area.