In southern California, a 420lb woman enters the ER complaining of a stomach ache, only to find she is 9 months pregnant and about to give birth. Shockingly, she had no idea she was pregnant.
Even more shocking, is that someone is having sex with her.
Even more shocking than that...how is sex physiologically possible? It takes at least six nurses to put a foley catheter in a 500lb patient.
I'm experiencing a big date drought, and stuff like this happens. I am depressed.
I'm now going to go drown my sorrows in cake batter ice cream. Maybe if I gain another 300lbs, my social life will pick up.