Pansies With Wheels

Robins are supposed to be an indicator that spring is here. So, I was puzzled when I saw my first robin because it was laying in the middle of the street...dead. I don't know what that was an indicator of, other than it was a dead robin. With today's nice day, I figured it meant nothing and moved on, especially when I saw a cluster of live robins playing in a water hole.

I took Sam to his obedience class, and afterwards, I took him to Sheridans because they have free puppy cones, and Sam loves frozen custard.

While I was sitting in the drive through, I noticed a group of guys, maybe in their late teens, early twenties, riding around on those little pocket bikes. They were being really retarded about it, too. Darting in front of oncoming cars, popping wheelies in the parking lot. It reminded me of the one guy in my neighborhood that owns one, and whizzes up and down the street like he is Billy Badass. I can count on more than one hand how many times this guy almost met the business end of my PT Cruiser.

I know a lot of towns are now passing ordinances that ban these little bikes from travelling on public streets because they are so small, they pose a safey hazard to themselves and other cars. I have to wonder, though, if guys don't realize that they look like big pussies riding these things.

They almost look like they lack the testosterone to ride a real bike, so they pushed their 7 year old brother off his bike and stole it.

Is a grown man on a bike built for Vern Troyer supposed to make us, as women, swoon?? And suppose it does make us swoon, how in the hell are you going to take us anywhere? Where are we supposed to sit? On your head???

Or maybe you can have your Mother pick me up.

Or I can just come over and we can play video games in your basement..