Eating a meal should never, ever be complicated.
I spoke with Paul (not dating!) last night, and I suggested breakfast when I got off work because I was a tard and forgot to bring a lunch. Not that I could have eaten a lunch if I wanted to. I was busy all night. I busted a patient eating Fig Newtons when he should have not been eating anything at all in prep for a test. Honestly, if you are going to be a rebel and buck the medical system, can't you think of something better than a Fig Newton??
At any rate, Paul said "call me in the morning and we'll see..." So, after I was finished with report, I called. He suggested lunch instead. Okay...at least I can go home and take a nap first.
So, I go home, cart heavy bags of mulched leaves to the curb and then fall into bed. I wake up an hour after my alarm is supposed to go off (for some reason, it doesn't). I call Paul and leave a message. He calls back a little later, already out and about running errands. "How about dinner instead?"
Paul: I have a hankering for Mexican. Know any?
Me: I'm sure I can drive around and find one mowing a lawn or something.
Paul: Very funny. What's a good place?
Me: I'm only familiar with what's around work and what's north of the river. Where are you at?
Paul: 119th street
Me: I don't know any Mexican restaurants there.
Silence ensues as dinner is pondered.
Paul: I'm still here.
Me: Did you decide?
Paul: No... What about Chili's?
Me: (thinking about all that grease) No...I'm not feeling Chili's...What happened to Mexican? Why not Salty Iguana?
Paul: I'm still here.
Me: Have you decided??
Paul: Not really. I'm hungry.
Me: What are you doing?
Paul: Just driving...
Me: What about Houlihans?
Paul: That's an option...
Me: Where are you at?
Paul: Closer to 135th
Me: WHAAAT! You're driving AWAY?
Me: The further you drive means more time I have to drive to get there AND I have to drive on 435 through evening traffic. AND my hair is still wet.
Paul: There's On The Border.
Me: I hate On The Border. They put onions in everything.
Paul: You're picky.
Me: And you're indecisive. Just pick a place! What happened to Houlihans??
Paul: Dunno. Maybe I should stop at a drive-thru. I'm hungry and I don't want to wait.
Me: Do you want to just go home?
Paul: I don't want you to drive in all that traffic.
Me: (clearly annoyed) Just say you don't want to have dinner, and don't feed me any lines.
Paul: There's a lot of traffic...
Paul: How about a rain check?
Me: If you're lucky...
So, it is finalized that the meal that has been in the planning stages all day has been cancelled due to an impasse. I'm pretty cranky because I haven't eaten since yesterday (unless you count a Rice Crispy treat another nurse brought in).
Some hours later, and I am still fuming.
I'm going to go have an egg sandwich.