Yeah, I know that vacation is a few weeks away, but as I always say: Luck favors the prepared.
Thus far, I've managed to buy some new clothes on clearance. You know, because it will be cold here, and I will be baking my ass off closer to the equator. Thankfully, stores are all to happy to get rid of their summer stuff, and I am all to happy to oblige.
In preparation for vacation, I've discovered a latent obsession: travel-sized items. It's like crack to me. Toothpaste, mouth wash, deodorant. The bigger the selection, the happier I am. You can find just about anything in travel-sized.
It's not like I'm a size-queen or anything. I don't like everything to be small.
Just ask Starbucks.
My most awesome find came today at CVS when I found they sold the little bottles of Tide. One bottle will wash up to 4 loads of wash. On the ship, you have to mortgage your house for one box of detergent that will wash, maybe, one full load.
This evening, I had my first session of tanning. As a rule, I avoid the sun unless slathered in SPF 500. This is why I look younger than I really am because I don't look like a saddle. Plus, as pale as I am usually, the sun isn't my BFF. However, a trip to the Caribbean mandates fake baking, lest I want to spend the entire week of my vacation holed up in my room with an industrial sized bottle of Aloe. Even with a base tan AND sunscreen, I usually fry. Somewhere in my family tree, there is an albino, I just know it.
At any rate, Mom and I both got tanning packages, and tonight was the first night. I picked one of those stickers that you stick on yourself to see just how tan you get over time, but just like tattoos, I couldn't figure out where to put it. So, I chucked the sticker. Any hint of color on me, people are bound to notice without the help of a little white heart on my body.
I baked for 7 minutes, and I still feel the burn on the backs of my legs and my face. I will so happy when I don't have to fake bake anymore. Some people are addicted to it. You usually can pick those people out of a crowd because they look like Oompa Loompas. Either that, or they are featured on Hot Chicks with Douchebags...as the "hot chick" or the douchebag. Sometimes, it's hard to tell the difference, particularly in California and Florida.
I'm mentally ready for vacation, but not even remotely close to being prepared physically. I have to make lists. Lists of what to pack. Lists of what to do before I go. Lists of home improvement projects for Mr. Recommendation while I'm gone. Even a list of lists I need to make.
I'm probably going to need a vacation to recover from vacation.
That's what Mardi Gras in New Orleans is for!
3 comments:
One time I fell asleep while fake baking. This particular tanning salon didn't set the automatic timer correctly and I was in there for God knows how long before I woke up. I had to skip college classes for a week and a half because I was so fried. Anything having to do with me sitting on my ass was also out.
Don't make my mistake. :)
Fried I tell you... Fried!!
I've discovered a latent obsession: travel-sized items.
Hrmmm. Reading that, I was thinking of Fight Club for some reason..
Also with regards to your obsession with travel-size, I've noticed that the Bed, Bath, & Beyond that I go to (on 119th at Metcalf) has a whole huge wall dedicated to the things. Not sure if its the same at all of their stores, but it might be like heaven to you!
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