Adventures in Homebuying: The Home Warranty

The other night, I attempted to fix a frozen pizza in the oven. The top was all cooked, but the crust was all soggy...not to mention it took forever to bake. I didn't think anything of it because I made a crap ton of chocolate wafers in the oven later that night.

Last night, I made this salmon dish from a recipe I found in my new cookbook. It was a seasoned salmon with a garlic cream cheese spread, topped with spinach, and wrapped in filo dough. Even Brother was excited to try this dish.

So, I prepared it and put it in the oven for the 12 minutes required. After 12 minutes, I pulled it out and noticed it wasn't finished cooking. How odd. I left it in the over for anther 15 minutes to the same result. When I opened the oven door, instead of a hot blast of air greeting my face, it was more of a warm wafting. Eyeing the still raw fish, Brother told me about his experience with a frozen pizza a couple days before, very similar to mine.

I heard the faint noise of a death march coming from the oven. My heart dropped. Dead oven!!

Ordinarily, I'd be thrilled at the idea of getting a new oven, but the oven that currently sits in my kitchen is a drop-in. I checked into replacing it shortly after I moved in. The very least I could expect to spend on a black, drop-in range, was $1000. After finding that out, I decided I could live with the relic of a range that came with the house indefinitely. Judging from the looks of it, the range is original, having been put there when the house was built so many years ago. Yeah, it's older than I am (I think), but that bitch could heat up faster than a virgin on prom night. I decided it was a good stove, and I called her Betty.

But now, she's showing her old age, and I can't even heat a burrito. This is a near-catastrophe because the oven gets lots of use in this house.

Brother thought it might just need a new heating element, so I called Mr. Recommendation, who reminded me that it should be covered under my warranty I got when I bought the house. D'oh!

I spent an hour looking through paperwork before I found said warranty, scanning over the contract and discovering that Dinosaur Betty was still covered. Woo-hoo!!

This morning, I called the home warranty people and explained my problem to a guy who had the personality of a bucket of piss. He transferred me to a more cheerful person at Sears who scheduled an appointment for the repairman to come over and assess Betty. For a $50 deductible, I will either get Betty fixed, or a replacement. But that is next week. So, Brother and I have to try to live without an oven until then...which is going to suck because now meals will either have to be nuked, or grilled.

Incidentally, I was finally able to finish cooking the salmon by killing it in the microwave. Crude, yes, especially after the pastry dough exploded. But, it was still edible. I'll have to try the recipe again after Betty is fixed.