Saturday, August 18, 2007

Friday Night Blather

Things with Brother are going well other than the fact that he smokes worse than a pile of burning leaves. He's banned from smoking in the house (as with all smokers), but has been good about going outside to light up without complaining. He's been pretty entertaining. Just the other night I was able to talk him into putting a cicada in his mouth for less than a dollar. He stood there, opening and closing his mouth while the cicada made it's buzzing noise. It was pretty funny in a disgusting sort of way. When we were younger, we used to tell him to put all kinds of stuff in his mouth just to see if he would do it. It's nice to know that somethings haven't changed.

Everyday he comes home from work and tells me all about his benefits and whatnot, which leads me to ask, "Do they hire nurses?" Seriously.

We are currently engaging in emails wars with the Bosshole. His first salvo was to chide us for binding the techs and flogging them with used foley catheters, then making them do their jobs. Actually, we just got lectured about that last part. Some techs need to be reminded of their job duties...every five minutes. Then, they go crying to the Bosshole about how big of victims they are because the evil nurses exact our misery on them every chance we get, which leads to hate mail from the Bosshole filled with lots of exclamation points. I returned the volley and sent out an email which pointed out that he sucked, but in big flowering words and sentence structure that really didn't come right out and say he sucked. Sometimes, you just have to read between the lines.

To his credit, the Bosshole is giving me some time off to recover from my Big Surgery next week. Maybe he did it because he knew I would just call in sick if he didn't. Somethings are more important than work. Maybe he did it because he is trying to redeem himself because he fucked up so badly, one of our pregnant nurses is without health insurance until the first of the year.

The hospital released some statistics. Housewide, nurse turnover is at 13%, which is really good when you compare it to other hospitals. For our floor alone, the turnover is 21%, earning us the title of Worst Floor In Entire Hospital. Like we didn't know that already. I wonder if any of the higher-ups have noticed, and maybe try to find out why we can't retain staff.

I had to call the doctor's office today and confirm my appointment next week for pre-op festivities. I swear, I've had to call them for everything: to find out what my test results were, to schedule my surgery, to schedule my pre-op stuff. The organization of that office stinks. I just hope they have their shit together by the time I'm wheeled into the O.R. or I am going to wake up with a penis.

I worked extra Thursday night, so tonight feels like Saturday. I have to keep reminding myself that it's Friday and I have one more shift. I'm taking Sunday off because of some appointments I have early Monday. Coincidentally, a friend I haven't seen in 10 years is coming for a short visit. I asked him what he wanted to do while he was here, and he told me, "Go see Harry Potter on IMAX." Apparently, IMAX doesn't exist in South Carolina. I think I may have him read something to me while he's here because he has the cutest southern accent.

Nothing more to report. I'm pretty tired...too tired to spew my usual weekend venom. I wish I had a good book to read right now. I think I will go find a book or two to read while I am recovering from having my hoo-hah sliced and diced. Kant suggested some good reads, and she always has good book suggestions.

Have a good weekend, y'all!!

1 comment:

"The D" said...

What's wrong with waking up with a penis? I do it everyday, and I like it!