Okay, so Tim McGraw and Faith Hill are coming to town in less than 3 weeks, and I have one extra ticket. Rather than just arbitrarily letting any schmuck go, I thought I would make things more interesting if I made it into a contest. A Who Loves Heather More Contest. The winner of said contest would win the extra ticket, and have the honor of going with me to the event. Being with me should be incentive enough to compete, the concert just gives us something to do.
So, to kick off the contest, here are a couple rules:
1. Showering Heather with gifts is accepted. However, gifts that cause an allergic reaction, or anything with a heartbeat automatically disqualifies you.
2. Good things earn you points, bad things will lost you points.
Example: taking Heather to Starbucks = points earned. Making Heather pay for it = points taken away.
3. Bribes will not be accepted, but flattery will. Even if it's bullshit.
4. If you show up at my apartment naked, I'll call the cops...then sick my dog on you.
Don't want to go through all this trouble of sucking up? Submit a proposal as to what you would do if you were my escort to the concert. All proposals will be carefully evaluated and considered.
I will keep a tally on all interested participants, and I will announce who the lucky winner is before concert time.